About Me

I am the proud mother of 6 children. 5 of our children have autism. We do not feel our world has ended, but just begun. We do not chelate, intervene biochemically, give shots of any kind, practice ABA, etc. We treat them as we treat any humanbeing. We treat them with kindness and respect and expect the same from them. They are exceptional children.

Saturday, March 24, 2007


Okay, It has finally happened, the select group of Biomedical Mama's (the BM's), as I like to call them, have lost their ever-loving minds.
Just this week, on this particular autism forum, this select group of 3 BM's have cited 2 doctors as the know-all and be-all of autism. It just so happens, with a little research (and I mean very little research), you find out both of these "doctors" have in fact lost their licenses to practice medicine. One of them has even lost the right to raise their own child.
The scary part is that these BM's would allow these "doctors" to treat their autistic children.....

Also, I see that the man who loves to hate autism is blaming Mr. Leitch for the death of a young man in Tucson.....I am beginning to worry alot about this hater of autism. He needs some help and quickly.

Now, how can these parent's ever think they can begin to help their autistic children if they are listening to every quack out there. Are they at the point where they are grasping at straws?
I am really frightened for their children.....I am frightened that they will have to succumb to more treatments in the name of "recovery".
Around every corner is another so-called "doctor", with a bag full of snake oil with these children's name on it. The insanity of it all is that the parent's of these children will buy this crap and give it to their children.

I spent the day today with a roomful of parent's of autistic children. These children were newly diagnosed. These parent's were scared and nervous.
I was introduced to them as being the parent of 5 autistic children.
These parent's looked at me in dismay.
I asked them to please listen to what was being told to them.
To please sit back and realize that their lives were just about to get a bit off-course. That they will have challenges they will never believe. That they will experience a life they were never expecting to.
I asked them to please not think the worst, but expect the best. To not think their child could not be anything other than they thought before the diagnosis.

I look at my children with their rocking, buzzing, humming, flapping and spinning. I look how they line up toys. I see how they get into their play and ignore all around them.
Who am I to say that is wrong?
Who am I to say that they are not doing what is normal?

I have been given the challenging task of raising 6 of the most amazing people in the world. This is not an easy task, but one I relish. I go to bed every night so happy that I am their mother.
I wake up every morning happy with the fact that these children will be in my sight within minutes. I smile each and every time I see them. I want them to they that they are vital on this earth and they will continue to be so. There are no challenges that they cannot meet...and I will be there every step of the way.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007


Today is Kiernan's 6th birthday and the 5th anniversary of his autism diagnosis. He has come such a long way with both monumental dates.
6 years ago, he was born, by c-section....he was breach and in distress. He was 3 weeks early, and still a whopping 9 pounds. He was almost 24 inches long. He is still very tall and skinny. Not much has changed there.
He was born with a smile and a dimple. I still love his little dimple.
By the time he was 1 year old, we knew that he was also autistic. We should have been used to the diagnosis, but I remember having to take a minute to put it into my mind. 4 with autism. Now that will be hard.
Deirdre was not diagnosed until a year later.

Kiernan is still very much autistic. He rocks, stims, hums...he is non-verbal, but uses sign-language and his Vanguard. He leads you to what he wants. He is independent and strong.
He is trying very hard to potty train. Not an easy fete. But, you see, I do not stress about the potty. There is so much more in life that is harder than potty training.
I do not know what Kiernan's future holds for him. Like my other children, I hope he matures into an independent adult. I can hope for the best, and prepare for the worst.
Like my other children, I adore him. He makes me smile when he walks in a room. He reminds me of why I am here on this Earth...to be his Mommy.

Happy Birthday my dear sweet little soul. I hope it is a happy one for you.

Monday, March 19, 2007


Saturday morning , the lovely people who helped unload and go through all of our pods returned to help us set up for our garage sale. They helped us set up over 14 tables of goodies. We started at 6 am and did not finish until 6 pm.
We had media there, so it was an opportunity for our family to help endorse the University of Texas Autism Project we have come to love so much. The goal of our garage sale was to net $1000.00 for this Program.
I am happy to say that we reached our goal. I am thrilled.

On another note....
Remember Robert, the young man I had met on Friday at the grocery store?
Well, Robert came to our home with his mother, father and Grandmother. He was even more interesting and lovely the second time I met him.
Robert comes from a family with style, grace and mostly love.
He was introduced to everyone and they were equally impressed.
Robert came inside and jumped on the trampoline. He loved it.
I hope Robert and his family can become a part of our extended family. He is one heck of a young man.

After the garage sale, we all gathered in the back yard, around a keg of course. We grilled hamburgers and enjoyed the evening with all of our family and friends.
We have a diverse group of people in our extended family. We have friends that are Democrats and we have friends who are Republicans. We have friends with NT children and friends with children on the spectrum. We can all gather together and get along splendidly. No mishaps or fights among any person.
Why in this world where diversity is so needed, is it so hard to accept Autism? I do not understand what is so hard about that......

Friday, March 16, 2007

I Saw Into My Future...

Today I went to the grocery store with 4 of my 6 darlings. Not an easy fete, but if I give Kiernan a donut with sprinkles, we do great.
I was walking by the deli, buying potato salad and cole slaw for after our garage sale tomorrow. I need to feed these great college kids who are helping us out tomorrow. I noticed a very tall, very handsome young man. He was buzzing while he was walking and flapping his hands in front of his face. I was pleased to see him and instantly thougth "AUTISTIC".
I finished my shopping and was going down my last aisle. I saw this very pretty woman and next to her was the handsome young man I had seen earlier. The lady and I made eye contact and then smiled at each other. She knew and I knew.
Later, at the check-out counter, while unloading my groceries onto the conveyor belt, this lovely woman approaches me. She said, "congratulations on the home, I hope you are enjoying it.". I told her we were and thanked her. She then introduced me to her son, Robert. She told me Robert was also autistic. I told her that I saw him earlier and had guessed that.
Robert shook my hand and got very excited when he found out we got the Extreme Makeover house. He had watched it on television.
I told his mom about the garage sale and to bring Robert by tomorrow and he could come inside to see the house. I told Robert about the trampoline room. He seemed pleased about that.
I asked what school Robert attended and his mother told me he was no longer in school. He was 21 years old. She homeschooled him from the 5th grade on up. I asked if he lived at home and she replied that he did.
Robert held eye contact with me while he talked to me. He was very pleasant in his speaking voice and I was thrilled to have met him. I hope to get to know this family better.
What a gift that was for me to meet Robert today. It gives me so much hope for all of my children, but especially Caitlin and Kiernan.
Thank you Robert...I got to see a bit into my future....I hope it is as shiny as yours.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

What are Parent's Looking For????

I must admit, I am stumped....

I am stumped by what I read from parent's of autistic children...what the heck are you looking for from your children?
Are you looking for a child who is accepted in the community?
Are you looking for a verbal child?
Are you looking for a happy child?
Are you looking for a calm child?
Are you looking for a child that fits into the norm of what society calls normal?

When Caitlin was diagnosed with autism almost 15 years ago, we felt lost. We looked for all of the answers. Unfortunately, there were not that many to our questions.
We read and read about autism. I thank goodness there was not much out there in the means of what they are offering now.

By the time Erin was diagnosed, we realized that our world would be okay. We realized that we had a rocky road with Erin, but with maturity, OT and Speech, she would get better. We also made sure Erin got extensive play therapy and Physical therapy. That worked for Caitlin as well.

Patrick showed autistic tendencies by 18 months and Kiernan by 12 months. We intervened immediately with both. They had in-home therapies and then Early Childhood.

For no reason at all, Erin and Patrick have come out of their severity....
Caitlin is still severe, but very functional and will contribute to society in some form...that is up to her.
We have no idea about Kiernan yet....he has so much further to go. He will get there.
Just this week he said, MAMA.....OMG.....who'd have thought....

Deirdre is a whole other story. Asperger's is just a different way of saying BRILLIANT. She will be of no worries to her father or myself.

Kiernan is sitting beside me, lining up his toys in an orderly fashion, calm as he can be.
Occasionally he is flapping and buzzing. I like this time with him.
Who am I to say this in inappropriate behavior?
Caitlin is upstairs, creating a beautiful portrait in her new art room....I hope some day to share her art with the world....

I volunteer at our school and have seen what society call normal. Believe me, I am much happier with what we have at home.

The AUTISM Around Me.....

As I sit here in the dining room, I am watching my youngest son Kiernan lining up Dragonball Z toys. He is very careful in his endeavor and not one is out of line. While lining up the toys he is humming.
I know many parent's of autistic children who would think this behavior is inappropriate. My question is WHY? Why is his lining up toys and humming inappropriate? Is it any different than someone else doing a jigsaw puzzle? I have observed many people do jigsaw puzzles in my 46 years. Some people separate the pieces before doing the puzzle by color. Some people do the outside of the puzzle first. Some people just go into the box and go to it.....
Which way is the correct way?

Who told parent's of autistic children that certain behaviors are not acceptable in society? Isn't our society full of diverse people? Isn't that what makes a society?

I love when Caitlin buzzes while watching her favorite movie on her DVD player. I love how she still flaps and jumps when she is happy. I think that is what makes Caitlin her unique self.
Sure she gets stared at in the grocery store when she does this behavior, but frankly, who cares?
I love how Deirdre looks when she is about to ask a question and she is not quite sure how you will answer it....I love that Deirdre could care less what brand of jeans you buy her or what haircut is the latest style. I love that Deirdre is obsessed with the Beatles so much, that she thinks she discovered them.
I love how Erin believes she will be the next American Idol. I love how she sings at the top of her lungs. I adore how sweet she is with her friends. I still think it is amazing how she can calm herself by rubbing a soft piece of fabric or wrapping herself in a blanket.
I love how Meaghan can be as sassy as a 15 year old and still have the innocence of a 9 year old. I love how people flock around Meaghan and think she is the coolest person alive...which she is by the way.
I love how little Patrick makes his wrestling toys wrestle in a ring like the professionals. I love how he knows every word to every Country song. How he can memorize the top 20 country music countdown every week.
I love how Kiernan bounces on his big red ball and giggles in glee. I love how Kiernan picks through his lucky charms and puts them all in piles of color. I love how Kiernan gets hugs from all the little girls at school and looks at them so oddly.

Kiernan has alot of the behaviors at the age of 5 that Caitlin had at the same age. Now, at 16, Caitlin's behaviors have calmed down or stopped. She does still flap and buzz when she needs to. This is okay. She does the buzzing to drown out sounds she does not want to hear. She flaps when she is very happy and needs to release her happiness.
What kind of parent would that make me if I demanded she stop this behavior?

I have been the parent of an autistic child for 16 years. I have learned in this time to accept and relish every moment with these children. I have learned that it is not for my children to be accepted by society, but for society to accept my children.
This will happen...and it will happen in MY children's lifetime.

Monday, March 12, 2007


Last weekend, Saturday the 10th, we arranged to have our old home belongings delivered back to us. You see, when we received the Extreme Makeover home, they packed up all of our old belongings and put them in storage. They allow you so many days to keep them in storage until they start charging you the monthly fee.
We knew it would be quite a task, but we had no idea how big it was going to be.
Patrick, my husband, and myself decided we do not need anything back from the old house. Since EMHE supplied us with all new items, we did not need to bring any clutter back into our new home. We decided to hold a garage sale and donate all the proceeds to the amazing University of Texas Autism Project. We spent a Saturday with these young adults and educators and they changed our lives.
Now, back to the storage dilemma.
To go through our belongings, we had to somehow get help. We had over 25 pods of belongings.....yes, we were pack rats.....WERE.
The fine people at the University Of Texas Autism Project sent out emails to all of their colleagues and low and behold, at my house on Saturday were over 30 people to help. EUREKA!!!!!
Through the pods we went. We trashed the garbage into a huge dumpster donated by the builder of our new home and tagged the rest for our garage sale next Saturday. We worked from 8am until 8pm. We got everything done...I KNOW...everything.
During the day, my husband and myself were so overwhelmed by the help we were receiving, we decided to host a barbecue that night. It is after all....Texas.
We went and got a keg of beer and some burgers to grill. Everybody pitched in and helped in the kitchen and outside. My children were in hog heaven. We ate, drank, and danced all night.
At 12:30am, we said goodbye to the last person.
Not only has this house changed my families life, it has changed the lives of all of our friends OLD and NEW. This house has strengthened our bonds to the community and it is overflowing in love.
We are thrilled to share our home with our friends and neighbors. They helped get it built and they will never know what that really means to us. We can tell them, but they will never really know.
Next Saturday, March 17th, St. Patrick's Day, we are hosting a benefit garage sale. We will have over 30 volunteers again to help. I cannot wait......

If you are in the neighborhood, stop by....I would love to see you.

Friday, March 09, 2007


GENIOUS...that is how I describe my child Deirdre...pure GENIOUS.

Deirdre is home sick today, she just doesn't feel well.
I was cleaning up the morning mess and Deirdre comes downstairs. She stands there as if she wants to ask me a question..that is how she does it.
I asked her what was on her mind.
She says, and I quote, "Mom, do you think there should be a cure for autism?"
I explain to Deirdre that I do not believe there will be a cure, but people are really trying to find one...
Deirdre asks me, "why do they want to find a cure for something that is not a disease?"
I explain that there are people out there who believe it is cureable.
I then ask my Deirdre, "Do you think there should be a cure?"
"Do you think you should be any different than you are?"

After a second of thought, Deirdre replied, "I think I am just fine the way I am".


She then told me she found out about this on Wikipedia....she told me there were people out there that were just like her. She found Aspies For Freedom, she found Neurodiversity.com, she found Right Brain/Left Brain....she has found a place for her feelings and intelligence.
You see, sometimes (just sometimes), I am not as smart as Deirdre...hard to believe, I know!

If you see Deirdre out there in Acceptance Land, give her a shout....
She is a great kid with an amazing mind.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007


I have worn glasses for many years...since the awkward age of 9 years old. I hated wearing them then, but now I use my frames as part of my wardrobe. It is fun to be funky sometime.
What I am getting at is that my vision is pretty lousy. Without my glasses, I cannot see 4 feet in front of me.
Yet, through my aging worn-out eyes, I see things others have a really hard time seeing.

I have been reading alot about autism lately. You really cannot help it....Autism is EVERYWHERE. I get recognized all over as the "Mom of the Autisitic children"...I like that one.

What I am reading disturbs me beyond belief. Every one is determined to find the cause of Autism...I have read it is too much television, not enough television, mother's, father's, age at time of conception for both parties, misdiagnosis (my personal favorite), over-diagnosis, genes, Immune Disorders, etc.
It really is becoming quite ridiculous and quite a little money-making scheme for alot of not-so-nice people.
Today, I read where one mother of an autistic child tells another mother to get a second mortgage on her home to finance her biomedical treatments and her DAN! doctor. WHAT????

Ladies and Gentlemen, you are the parent's of autistic children. They will always be autistic children. With maturity and much, much LOVE, your children WILL GET BETTER....I promise.

How discouraging it must be to lose so much time measuring and counting out pills, inserting suppositories, rubbing creams, etc into these children...and in the end you have an autistic child.
How discouraging it must be to believe that you are watching recovery on a big screen at a DAN! conference....and in the end all you see is a more mature autistic child.

My family has been involved with autism for 16 years. They have not always been easy. We have had all of the ups and downs involved with raising autistic children. We have watched these amazing children go from the worst autism has to offer to respected individuals in our community.
I DO NOT understand why parent's of autistic children have such a difficult time in dealing with the autism. The autism is a condition your child has, it does not define your child.
If you feel the need to define them, then purchase one of the tee-shirts that so love to label the child.

So THROUGH MY EYES....as poorly in vision as they are....I see a home full of the most amazing children:

I see:
Caitlin-my artist
Deirdre-my philosophist
Erin-my rock star
Meaghan-my governor
Patrick-my wrestling country singer
Kiernan-my sunshine on a rainy day

And that to me is so much better than 20/20 vision