About Me

I am the proud mother of 6 children. 5 of our children have autism. We do not feel our world has ended, but just begun. We do not chelate, intervene biochemically, give shots of any kind, practice ABA, etc. We treat them as we treat any humanbeing. We treat them with kindness and respect and expect the same from them. They are exceptional children.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

ACCEPTANCE...

I have been trying for a while to understand why it is so damn difficult for Society to accept our Autistic Children. I have insisted upon inclusion for my children, with much success, because I believe if you alienate an Autistic child in a specialized "autistic" program...not only will that child continue their behaviors, they will pick up the behaviors of others.
I believe if a child with Autism is included with the "normal" child in a traditional educational setting, they will pick up socially appropriate behaviors....I have proof it works.

Since Ms. McCarthy and Dr. Kartzinel have decided to tout Autism and Autistic children as less than what is acceptable to not only their own parent's but the doctors that treat them...namely DAN! doctors....then how can we expect anyone else out there to respect our children.

I have made this my mission, for the past 16 years, to let our children be inclusioned in their educational and community settings. It has taken me many years to get where we are as a family in our community. It has taken one very irresponsible "actress" and a "doctor" who will make a butt-load of money to bring down ACCEPTANCE a notch.....

I have written every news station, every talk show, every major television station, every news program and pleaded with them to show Autism at its finest.....less the doom and gloom....less the drama of head-banging, screaming, temper tantrum, bloated belly, mercury induced hysteria......
I have pleaded with them to show the beauty of our amazing, gifted, talented, funny, beautiful children and young adults with Autism......

Guess what?????
Not one response....
Are you surprised????

12 comments:

Camille said...

Not surprised. But depressed. A big part of the problem is that $$$money talks$$$ and the folks who got their foot in the door a few years ago with the media, that would be Portia Iversen and hubby, Rick Rollens, and various and sundry other media savvy and well funded folks have repeated that autism is purely a neverending nightmare, you could wish that your kid had cancer and would die before you'd wish your kid had autism... and so forth.

And we don't have anyone with money to outspend the creeps with the "nightmare" rhetoric at this point. Portia Iversen wasn't a celebrity exactly but she had some kind of conection with celebrities so she had celebs as members of CAN early on. This was mesmerizing to idiot scientists who salivated at the idea of being able to go to a CAN dinner and meet (name a star).... and of course the media respond to classy offices and sophisticated press releases. They are not so impressed with blogs, though blogs do some good they have a hard time competing with Good Ol' Bob Wright with his millions (and movie star/tv star connections) and the rest.

If there was a star who would promote acceptance and if there was an office (like Estee's Autism Acceptance Project as far as attitude) with loads of money for press releases and parties with celebs... television commercials... maybe we could get the attention of the media... until then it's like telling people that dogs can really talk.

It's absolutely true that the news media want gore, "If it bleeds, it leads." is not just a joke.

If you say they can come and tape as your one kid head bashes another kid, they might like that one. Tell them that they can come and show your kids looking more or less normal and happy, forget it.

If you have a whole high school of typical kids cheering an autistic kid playing basketball, that's cool, but the kid has to play with incredible skill. If the ASD kid is just playing as good as the other kids isn't going to make the nightly news.

The answer is to get the big orgs to stop abusing autistic people by describing them as monsters. But they are having an absolute blast at portraying autistic kids as monsters and I don't see them stopping any time soon. They are laughing all the way to the bank. :-(

Joseph said...

Pushing for inclusion is the right thing to do. Don't give up.

Roxan said...

I'm not surprised at the lack of response. I once called newspapers about putting in an announcement for a charity moto-cross for a child with multiple disabilities who needed surgery. I kept getting all sorts of excuses. One of the twenty or more I called said they would put something in.
If you believe inclusion is the best thing for your child-fight for it.
I was in a situation where SPED was the right way to go for my daughter at one point. When we moved to a different school district things changed and she did much better with inclusion.

Club 166 said...

...It's absolutely true that the news media want gore, "If it bleeds, it leads." is not just a joke. ...

I believe that this is the major reason that you haven't had a reply. Between this reason and America's 'cult of celebrity' (if you don't have royals, you just substitute celebrities) getting a positive reply would be near miraculous.

Joe

Chaoticidealism said...

Inclusion isn't always the best. Autistic children can be severely bullied by typical kids... sometimes it is best to give them respite from this problem, especially during junior high and higher, when the autistic child's special interests most likely require a gifted-and-talented program anyway...

Mom26children said...

Hi CI,
I will respectfully disagree about inclusion. ALL of my children are inclusioned at some point during the day. They are not bullied, but are nurtured by their NT classmates.
They have been inclusuioned since Pre-K.
The only way we can achieve success with Acceptance, is to start early with not only our children, but the NT child also.
Bullying should never be tolerated, but even as adults, we find ourselves being bullied. How can we expect our adult child with autism to be able to handle this as an adult, when we seclude them as children?
Jeanette

Some Random Girl said...

not surprised. if they talk about it...they have to do something about it. between the Darfur's and the war and all the other political crap in between who knows why they don't care about our children.

Anonymous said...

I understand that all families function differently but as the mom of a child with severe autism, I will use any avenue can find so that my child can have a normal life where he can experience life, love happiness as we did. It is not enough just to funtion and exist.....As parents we need to try everything before just saying "they are happy and loved"... Thinking if what will happen when I am gone robs me of sleep every night. Perhaps biomed is not the answer for every family but it is equally as wrong for you to settle that this is the life your child was given and not fight for what he/she can be. We have had to give up litelly "all"" of our material possesions to start biomed but our reward was hearing our child speak after years of slilence. At least we know he has a chance.

Mom26children said...

Anonymous,
Our severely autistic daughter speaks after being silent for 9 years. She is now almost 17 and is doing amazingly well in regular high school.
I DO NOT understand why it is so difficult to understand that by accepting our children, we ARE NOT sitting back and watching them do nothing.
We are working very hard to get our children focused and ready for society.
Guess what???
Not one ounce of anything biomedical....
I am not talking about diets...I am talking about the dangers of using chelation, Hbot, and other untested dangerous procedures.

Jeanette

Ettina said...

"I have been trying for a while to understand why it is so damn difficult for Society to accept our Autistic Children. I have insisted upon inclusion for my children, with much success, because I believe if you alienate an Autistic child in a specialized "autistic" program...not only will that child continue their behaviors, they will pick up the behaviors of others.
I believe if a child with Autism is included with the "normal" child in a traditional educational setting, they will pick up socially appropriate behaviors....I have proof it works."

As an autistic person who was included in regular classes whenever I was in school (I've also been homeschooled) I suffered greatly from that supposed 'benefit' of inclusion. I was bullied repeatedly by kids because I acted differently. I tried somewhat to conform, and everything I conformed about resulted in me essentially hurting myself. Whenever I tried to force myself to make friends I exhausted myself to get a 'friend' who I didn't really care about and who I felt really didn't know me. When I've finally started spending time with others like me, I've found myself able to interact positively because I don't stand out, and because many of them interact in similar ways to me. So what if I act more autistic around them? I feel safe, I feel accepted. And autistic behaviors aren't 'innappropriate', just different. I never used to handflap much until I met one autistic boy who does that whenever he's excited. I've picked up that habit from him. It's nothing bad, it's just a mannerism, and it feels right to me to do that. I wish people wouldn't use things like that as an argument for why autistics should be kept isolated from each other - it's a good thing for me, as it helps me express myself. I don't tend to pick up mannerisms from non-autistic people, because they don't feel right. I'm different. Why is that a bad thing? Why is it that we're supposed to try to imitate normal people instead of being ourselves?

LAA and Family said...

My blood just about boils every time some "celebrity" gets on some talk show and talks about things like "curing" or "defeating" autism. The only ones I've actually watched, however, have been Larry King (only because I'm too busy to ever have the TV on with my shows at other times). I was disgusted after watching Larry King's show last year about autism. I set myself up for more disappointment recently by watching Larry King again (Feb 27, 08). I even e-mailed a question to the show to see what any of the guests might think about the idea that Roy Richard Grinker presented in "Unstrange Minds" about there being no autism epidemic... Of course my e-mail wasn't used on the show. In fact, no audience questions were used.

Like I've said before, there is a SPECTRUM of parent reaction to their child's diagnosis of autism and there is a SPECTRUM of ways that people live with it (or try to destroy it!). I'll be glad when we see more of that in the media.

Anonymous said...

I agree that inclusion can benefit both the person with autism and the people around them but I think it should be an individual decision. The thing about autism is that it can affect different people differently and to pronounce judgment on a parent because they decided to use chelation or ABA or inclusion as a means to help their child seems unfair.

Marie