About Me

I am the proud mother of 6 children. 5 of our children have autism. We do not feel our world has ended, but just begun. We do not chelate, intervene biochemically, give shots of any kind, practice ABA, etc. We treat them as we treat any humanbeing. We treat them with kindness and respect and expect the same from them. They are exceptional children.

Monday, February 26, 2007

THE FORTUNE COOKIE......

After we finished dinner tonight...I made Chicken Stir Fry...we opened up our fortune cookies. Erin was first..."keep in touch with your form of the arts", that is soooo Erin. She is our daughter who received the karaoke room.
Meaghan was second...hers was "others will enjoy your radiance". Again, that is Meaghan..our non-autistic daughter who is nothing less than radiant.
Deirdre's was third..."someone admires your beauty"...Deirdre is our wall-flower. She is a stunner in hiding.
Then came mine...."you will become an accomplished writer"....EUREKA !!!!

All of my adult life I have only wanted to be a mother and a writer. Now, because of my fortune cookie, it can happen. I love to write.

Before I opened my cookie, I thought about all that has happened to us in the past 3 months. The Extreme Makeover of our home and lives, the new friends we made and have kept with us, the amazing changes in our children and ourselves.....what more fortune could I want.

As I have written since I have started to comment about our new home, we have decided to keep the negatives out of our life. This includes the people who do not want to understand our children or feel the children are too difficult for them to manage. This includes some family members on both my husband's and myself's side.
We have kept our amazing friends and added so many more to the family. This has added so many bonuses to our children's lives.

I still continue to read the AW Forum, but now feel it is not the place for me....The people who post there do not want to know what to do for autism. They want to complain and whine about why their children have autism. What used to be a nice forum to chat and get to know other parent's has become a place where certain "bullies" feel they can "rule the roost" so to speak.
Unfortunately, these women have no idea what autism is....they think they do, but they don't.
They take their amazing children and make them guineau pigs for any doctor who promises them a cure. They take these darling children and do procedures to them that end up causing seizures...at least in one of their children.
The sad part is that there are parent's out there in Autismland, who are looking for answers, and these women think they can give them the answers....AS IF !!!! Better yet are the YouTube videos that parent's of autistic children subject you to....a whole 9 minutes of crying...WTF?????
I have been criticized for speaking my mind...that is just what I do...you don't agree with me, DON'T READ MY BLOG !!!!!
In the future...I can say...DON'T BUY MY BOOK !!!!

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

NEURODIVERSITY....

One must remember, that I have been in the world of AUTISM for 16 years. I did not come upon this yesterday, or even last year. But, last year, I did come upon Neurodiversity by accident....
You see, I was at a point in my life that I knew there was something more to Autism. I did not believe Autism was the end of the world for my children or my family. Our financial situation was not pretty, but our children were thriving in school and in the community.
I was a member of a local Autism Message Board and it was becoming quite depressing reading all of the new procedures these parent's were doing to their children. I would respond to these parent's about our home. How our children are progressing without the use of these procedures. I just wanted, especially new parent's, to know that they did not have to go to such extremes to "recover" or "cure" their children.
Upon my Google search for Autism, I found the AutismWeb Forum message board. I started reading the messages. I read the pro-biomedical side and the anti-biomedical side. I was in heaven that I found people out there, in cyber-space, that thought the way I did about Autism. That there were parent's out there that accepted their Autistic children.

As I began to post messages and try to give my opinion, I quickly found out that the Neurodiverse, as we are called, are not readily accepted on this site. The biomedical community seems a bit "put-off" with anything the ND have to offer. It is the Biomedical way or the Highway to most of them. I have never seen such hate spewed to others. What is wrong with listening to others? Why do the Biomedical parent's feel the need to defend themselves so vehemently? Why are they so damn angry?

Through the Neuro-diverse, I have learned alot. I have learned through this group that you do not have to behave hatefully. Dignity is what I see....that is what I am trying to teach to my children....DIGNITY. I do not see name-calling or anyone hating anyone else. I do not see people talking behind other's backs on locked message boards. Everything is out there for the world to see. And that is all the Neurodiverse is trying to do, in my opinion, is to let the World see that Autism and person's with the disorder can fit perfectly in this place we call society.

I, as a mother, only want my children to be who they are meant to be. They are strong, intelligent, well-loved, admired children. What parent could ask for more?
Through the ND community, I have learned to do this better. I have learned that our community was very happy to embrace all of our children...autistic or not.
I thank them for that.

I started this post before our Extreme Makeover Home Edition show aired. I waited to post it, because I knew there would be people, namely 2, who thought it was okay to demean me and my children.

The Extreme Makeover event changed more than our home...it changed our lives. It made our family closer. It made us realize that we were doing the correct things for our children all along.
We have met some amazing people through our journey with EMHE..the producer's, the "stars", and the crew, the people of Crested Butte, CO, the ski instructors..(hello Pablo) and everyone involved have all become family to us.
We were a bit nervous about the changes and the effects it would have on our kids, but they were amazing. Autistic children have a hard time with any change in their routines, but our children were awesome. Not even a whimper on the airplanes. We were so proud.
Not once did we have to video tape an episode of "OCD" for the world to see...amazing. Not once did we have to show our children having a fit...not Temper Tantrum 1 or Temper Tantrum 2...if you know what I mean....

The only positive we wanted to show out of Extreme Makeover was that our children were awesome....and the producer's made sure that happened. Through them and Ty, Paige, Eduardo, Paulie, and Tanya the world saw that autism is not a disability...we truly thank them for that.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

UT Autism Project ROCKS....

We were invited, by the wonderful people at the University Of Texas Autism Program to attend a workshop yesterday. They invited all the teacher's, therapists and autism specialists at AISD that have anything to do with our children. They also invited all of our family and friends.
This was done after the program at UT discovered our family through Extreme Makeover.
We attended from 9:30 am to 3:30 pm. They provided breakfast and lunch.
Then we began.
All 6 children were led to the gymnasium and introduced to about 20 of the most amazing college student's alive. These young men and women are making autism and the education of autistic children their lives.
The kids took to them immediately and into the classroom the adults went.
I spent the next 2 hours listening intently on the way play therapy, incorporated in the home and in the classroom, is essential for ALL children. But, mostly for Autistic children.
This wonderful instructor introduced the program and implemintations as a therapy, not a "cure". I liked her right off of the bat.
After the lecture, we were taken into the gym, where we were put with the children at different stations.
I know, I am annoying when it comes to talking about my children.....BUT, my children are AMAZING. Not one of them had a temper tantrum, breakdown, meltdown or any behavioral problems at all. They were giggly, happy and compliant.
After completing the day, I was asked to be interviewed by 2 local television stations that were there recording the day's events with my children.
Being the media "whore" that I am ( or so I am told that I am called ), I was interviewed. I must admit, I love the camera. The reporters asked me about the day, the program and my children.
Then they asked the big question, "What about the new data of 1:150 autistic children"?
I asked them if they wanted my "honest" opinion or what I really thought?
They said, "Go for It"...
I told them that I believe the good people who really want to get autism correct will go back to the drawing board. They will start where Leo Kanner started.....classic autism. They need to shut the PDD umbrella and make a new autism diagnosis criteria.
Why does every disorder have to sit under the "autism" umbrella? That just makes no sense.

I hope that Pam and Jody, the women who run the UT program get National exposure. I hope the world learns about their approach to teaching autistic children.
I wish every educator, parent, family member, and friend of an autistic child could take this course. These 2 women could change the way autistic children are treated in the school systems and at home.
They take sensory integration and incorporate it into the home and classroom.

The week before we attended the program, they had a major setback. The gymnasium where they kept their equipment was flooded and they lost most of their therapy equipment. The University will not replace it....they need donations.
We are working on a fundraiser for this amazing program...any ideas out there????

Thursday, February 08, 2007

SWEET 16....

Yes, it is true, my daughter Caitlin turned 16 today. She was born on Feb. 8, 1991 at 1:37 AM.
She came in at 8 lbs. 11 oz. She was one of the smaller babies I gave birth to.
Caitlin was 2 weeks late, and I was so happy to see her. She was beautiful. Big blue eyes and the most beautiful face. She seemed in shock at birth, but she came very fast. She was born in the ER, because they did not have time to prep me. No epidural, no drugs at all.
Caitlin screamed furiously from the day she was born. She never slept at night and she wore me out. I thought it was something I was doing wrong as a new mother. I knew something was wrong from birth, but promised this child she would never need for anything. I have tried to keep that promise.
As Caitlin grew, she met all milestones. She walked at 9 months, but NEVER crawled. She babbled, but NEVER spoke. I took her to the doctors, but not one would listen to me.
Finally, after 4 doctors, I found one who would listen. Dr. Blumberg told me he was worried about her not talking....Caitlin was 2 1/2.
We started interventions immediately. She was enrolled in Speech Therapy 2 times a week, Occupational Therapy 1 time a week and Physical Therapy 1 time a week.
She was enrolled in a preschool for regular kids and given a one-to-one. She has had one ever since.
Caitlin continued to do better. But, still no words and alot of behavioral problems. We tried everything from GFCF, Supplement powders (what a friggin waste of money) and ABA Therapy (like training a dog)....
Finally, Patrick and I decided enough was enough. Let us just let this little girl be that, A Little Girl.
Caitlin began to thrive. She was using sign language like a professional. She was following rountines at school. Her temper tantrums STOPPED. She became a sweet, loving little girl.
Caitlin continued to do well in school. When she was 9, she decided to start talking. She has never stopped. In fact, she has never regressed in ANYTHING. She has always shown progress in all of her tasks....hmmm....I wonder why? We never pulled any metals out of her....we never gave B12 shots......Oh, maybe that is why!!!

She is a bright, straight A student, with an amazing aide at school. Her teacher's adore her and her classmates are amazed by her.

Caitlin is still Autistic. Caitlin will be Autistic for the rest of her life. She will have a quality life, just as I promised her the day she was born.....16 years ago today. That is why 16 is SWEET to me, her mother.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

JUST THE FACTS......

I have decided to take a few minutes, out of a very busy day, to set some facts straight about me, my family and my life. What you are about to read is the TRUTH....not the blatant LIES that are thrown out all over the internet about me.

I am the mother of 6 children. 5 of them are on the autism spectrum. My oldest will be 16 tomorrow (OMG) and the youngest will be 6 next month. They are labeled with classic autism. They both fit this label and will remain Autistic the rest of their lives. Caitlin was exactly like Kiernan at his age. She tore clothes out of dresser drawers, like him....she smeared her feces, like him....she did not talk, like him. Caitlin now completely is self-sufficient, yet she needs constant supervision (for safety reasons). She does not smear feces, destroy drawers and she talks. She will answer any question and will tell you what it is like to be autistic. She is an amazing artist and a truly AMAZING person. Kiernan has his moments, but I would not trade him for the world.
Erin, 10 and Patrick, 7 are in the PDD-NOS part of the spectrum. At one time, they were severely autistic. Through maturation and perseverance on their part, the school's part and yes my Husband and myself's part, they got better. NO biomedical, chelation, or B12 shots required. Also, these 2 are now fully inclusioned and are indistinguishable from their same-aged peers (and better behaved, I might add). These 2 used to smear feces, toothpaste, mud, etc. Erin and Patrick would scream for hours. They outgrew this behavior.
Deirdre, 12, was diagnosed with Asperger's when she was 9. This diagnosis was a surprise to us. It did not change who Deirdre was, just explained her quirkiness and her amazing way to describe things in the most accurate detail. She is the smartest person I know. She has social issues and has struggled with this for years. I am happy to say, she has found a lovely group of friends that adore her.....along with her adoring family, what more could a girl need?
Meaghan is our only NT (so to speak). She is far more challenging to me than any of the autistic children. She has all the angst that a little 9 year old girl should have and the attitude to go with it. She has more friends than I can count and they all love her.

Please note, that there is not one of these children I would not have wanted to give birth to. We adore each and every one of these children. When questioned why I had so many children when we had a child with autism, I first say, None of your business....then I explain that I was pregnant with Meaghan (#4) when we found out Erin was autistic. I had Patrick 2 years later, while using a low-dose birth control (the only birth control I could use, because I was still breast feeding a 13 month old Meaghan. ). Patrick was 6 months old when I became pregnant with Kiernan....same birth control.
My children are all wanted and loved.....don't ever question that again.....

Now, there is another story being spewed across the internet. This is that I curse out parent's who do biomedical, chelation, B12 etc. That is a LIE.....show me where I EVER cursed out any person on the internet.
I have never called anyone "trashy", a lazy bugger, psychotic, etc....Sound familiar to any of you out there? If you need your memory refreshed, just ask me, I will let you know who you are.
I have only written that I believe it is very sad that a child of such a young age should be subjected to these kind of procedures. Call them what you want, but it is barbaric to ME....
You can use whatever excuse you want to make you happy for doing this, but I cannot see being a well-adjusted child while undergoing these procedures. My opinion.
See, I did not call names...just stated my opinion.
You guys might want to try this.

There is also someone out there, in lala land, who is writing that my husband has anger-management issues with me. How funny is that? My husband is by far the most patient man I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. He is not as out-spoken as his adoring wife, but he has not one abusive bone in his 6'5" frame. I hope you all have someone in your lives that love you as much as my husband loves me and his children.

Now, about our new house. I cannot mention the interior until the show airs. But, I was not given a GAG ORDER not to blog or go onto message boards. I took that upon myself, because I read some things written by 2 women in particular. I did not need to give them any fodder.
I hope when the show is aired, they watch with an open mind and truly see the beauty, intelligence and stregnth in our children. I hope they look past the fact that we were in financial difficulty and our home was not in stellar condition.
I hope they see how our whole community rallied together to give us this amazing gift and also see the gift that was given to the community in return.

Also, we did not nominate ourselves for this show. Our neighbor, Stan, nominated us. He is like family to us and saw we were in a situation we needed help with. Thank God for him. He is the person I will go to if I ever decide to run for office (just kidding, of course).

I do not have time for any more of the nonsense written about me from people who obviously do not know me. I have plenty of time for the loved ones in my life. The people that I have chosen to surround me and my family. I do not keep negatives in my life. That is bad for my children. I do not HATE anybody or anything. I just know who to keep out of our lives and who to let in.

And on one more note, while I am stating the FACTS, I find it interesting that people who write such negatively things about me on the blogger that Hates Autism so much ( you know the one), finds it necessary to hide behind the ANONYMOUS label. All I can say to that is how ridiculous it is that people believe what is written by someone who is not even brave enough to write their real names. If you want to accuse me of something, have the chutzpah to let me respond to a real person. There are very feeble-minded people out their that really believe the CRAP you write about me and my family. Get some back-bone or leave me out of your comments.

I hope this helps to understand my family better.
We are a "normal" family. My children are not defined by their autism. They are defined as the following:
Beautiful
Smart
Caring
Well-behaved
Quirky
Funny
Huggable
Loud
Respectful
ADORED by all

What more could a Mother and Father ask for?